Thursday, August 18, 2005

pookiellamarazzi

yesterday as stephen was biking home past pratt, all the streets were closed off for some big filming to-do. he asked a production lackey what it was all for, and they said it was a movie called the good shepherd. we imdb'd it, and it turns out that there might be some bonafide big-ass hollywood types in our little neghborhood!

1) it's being directed by deniro, but as stephen works in tribeca and has had to deal with tribeca film festival stuff for years, and deniro hasn't been in a good movie in years (please don't defend meet the parents to me. i hated that movie as much as i love zoolander, and that there is a lot of hate), and he's too old and boring to be involved in any fun celebrity scandal/gossip, deniro is really no big whoop. but don't worry, it gets more interesting...

2) billy crudup has a supporting role! i would love to see him and his cheekbones.

3) matt damon is starring! okay, actually that's not too exciting to me either. the only time i think i have ever really given matt damon any thought was like 6 years ago when i did a focus group for a company that was developing a new brand of vodka. they would name existing popular brands of vodka and ask us things like "what's the first thing that pops into your mind when you hear that brand?" and "what celebrity do you associate with that brand, and why?", and when they asked me those questions about absolut, i answered, respectively, "high school and vomitting" and "um, i guess maybe...matt damon? you know, bland, boring, safe, accessible....", which earned me some serious glares of hatred from most of the other girls on the panel, who had just pontificated about how much they loved absolut and used the bottles for vases, and probably thought matt damon was just dreamy. but, hey! it was a focus group—i was there to be honest, not make friends, especially not with a bunch of absolut-swilling ting girls. anyhoo. where was i? oh yeah, about to reveal the crown jewel:

4) mr. absolut's wife is being played by...the jolie! one half of bradgelina, miss superlips herself, is possibly hopefully going to be mere blocks from my house! joe lee!* in my hood! sorry for all the exclamation points, but this is exciting. i may be able to deny or confirm the pregnancy. i might even see brad. maybe he'll be there with the kids, taking care of them while joe lee "acts". the tabloids have landed in clinton hill, people.

so, have no fear—mr. baby man and the camera and i will be out there tomorrow seeing what we can see. we were going to go today but he's still a little sicky and therefore cranky and didn't seem up for a walk. i told him about joe lee, but he just said "nang!" and smacked me in the eye. but tomorrow, i promise.

joe lee!



* sarah told me a few weeks ago that one of her coworkers refers to angelina as "joe lee", and we have since taken it up as well. yes, it is kinda like just saying her last name, but there are subtle differences in intonation, and a definite little pause between the "joe" and "lee". it's pronounced with a teensy bit of a southern accent, with equal emphasis on the "joe" and the "lee", but always with empasis. as in "oh, joe lee," or "what have you done, joe lee?" try it, it's fun!

1 comment:

sassy said...

did you see the skank herself?! joe lee in brooklyn, who would've thunk it??!!